by Sarah Small
Say what????????? You didn’t listen to a word you just heard did you? Much too busy thinking of what you need to do this afternoon, or what time you need to leave work today because you need to get to that yoga class (if that’s your thing).
Hands up who is guilty of not always giving someone your full attention…..yep, be honest. Pretty much all of us fall into this trap, some more often than others, but did you know how much it can hinder your relationships? We form an opinion of someone extremely quickly, and once you have a reputation of not listening to others, it may create boundaries with your peers and colleagues. So in honour of the fact that you are listening (or in this case- reading) to us, here are our tips to improve this extremely important skill!
#1 MAINTAIN EYE CONTACT
This is really important as it shows the person talking that you are hearing them, and are interested in what they have to say. If you are working with someone, it makes them feel valued. The last thing that you want to find is that someone doesn’t feel like offering their opinions, because they won’t get listened to. Everyone has something worth offering- keep open-minded when listening to their opinions, as it could be a breakthrough opportunity for your business.
#2 AVOID THINKING ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO SAY NEXT
So many people listen to respond, not to actually take in what they are being told. When you listen to hear, you learn more, open up your interests and gain a higher understanding. Paul O’Brien wrote a really good article on this last year, and he explained that when networking, he found that instead of being eager to talk, when he listened to what others were really telling him about their businesses, and asking them more, he gained more “knowledge about the person (able to find relatable conversation points) – knowledge about the Business (able to tailor any responses for your solution to match their needs with your service/product) – knowledge about the industry (ability to identify current and future potential for this market) – knowledge about their clients (ability to identify potential synergies with this person and their company) – Knowledge about the pains which they are experiencing, the business and the industry are all experiencing”.
#3 DON’T INTERRUPT
When you interrupt someone, not only is it rude, but it stops their flow of thoughts and you won’t get the proper value. This is a really difficult communication skill to master, and so many of us find it hard not to do. The end result of this is that the communication goes off on a tangent, and the message isn’t conveyed the way it might have been intended. If you know that this is a vice of yours, try this……when you are listening to someone, put your tongue on the roof of your mouth as they are speaking- it helps to stop you from responding as quickly as you might have done otherwise.
#4 GIVE THE PERSON YOUR FULL CONCENTRATION
Don’t pick up your phone, reply to messages/ texts. Look them in the eyes and let them know that what they are saying is important to you. Not easy, but worth it.
#5 ASK QUESTIONS OR REQUEST EXAMPLES FOR CLARIFICATION
Just don’t interrupt them to do it!! It shows you have really heard what they have said and have been listening to them. It also fuels your interest and knowledge.
Communication is something we learn from an early age and copy from those around us. Be aware of how you do it, and improve your listening skills, both in your personal life and business. It will greatly improve your relationships and business opportunities and you will be thankful for it.
If you want to talk to us about how we can help you with your business, contact us here. Have a great week!
#aDigitalMe